Monday, April 26, 2010

Bad-Prose Rants from Lady Wawa

This is my technical communicator parody (abbreviated) of Lady Gaga’s monster hit “Bad Romance”. Her Youtube video is approaching 200,000,000 views. For related videos and lyrics, do Google searches. Note: Lyrics accuracy varies among sites. Lyricsmode.com, which I used for most of my research and initial lyrics, had the best accuracy contrasted with other lyrics sites.

Bad-Prose Rants from Lady Wawa

Uh oh uh oh oh oh no no no no no no,
Your doc seems pretty poor.

Uh oh uh oh oh oh no no no no no no,
Your doc seems pretty poor.

Ras-ras-raspberry,
Ras-ras-raspberry,
Gag—I just might choke,
A doc is not a joke.

Ras-ras-raspberry,
Ras-ras-raspberry,
Gag—I just might choke,
A doc is not a joke.

Unmatched tenses are plenty to see,
Subjects and verbs don’t often agree,
Well you should see,
You skipped some concepts that are key.

Your lists aren’t swell; items aren’t parallel,
Paragraphs too long, too many lines just read wrong,
Re-duce, re-duce,
Re-reduce redundancy,
(Re-reduce redundancy.)

(spoken)
You know you wrote bad,
It's only your first draft,
Take another pass; improve that trash.

You need to improve that piece of poo,
And upload some better content,
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh.)

Please tighten the prose so it won't look so hosed,
And so it won't make me retch.

Uh oh uh oh oh no no no no no not this,
Don't ship the piece as is.

Nah nah, no no, it's not good work,
Improve it, and don't write it worse.

Ras-ras-raspberry,
Ras-ras-raspberry,
Gag—I just might choke,
A doc is not a joke.

Edit, edit punctuation,
Periods, commas, exclamations,
Word, word, use thesaurus,
Choose the words most glorious.

Move, move, move some clauses,
If they bring about good pauses,
Shorten up some sentences,
If they make for better senses.

Fix misplaced mods,
Fix comma probs,
Fix split infinitivin’s,
Fix letter cap nits.

Fixez punctuation,
Fixez double negation,
Fixez tout formatting,
Do style guide adhering,
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh),
Do style guide adhering,
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh),
Do style guide adhering,
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh),
Do style guide adhering,
(Doing a bad-prose ranting),
Do style guide adhering.

You need to improve that piece of poo,
And upload some better content,
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh.)

Please tighten the prose so it won't look so hosed,
And so it won't make me retch.

Uh oh uh oh oh no no no no no not this,
Don't ship the piece as is.

Nah nah, no no, it's not good work,
Improve it, and don't write it worse.

Ras-ras-raspberry,
Ras-ras-raspberry,
Gag—I just might choke,
A doc is not a joke.

5 comments:

Shannon du Plessis said...

Brilliant!

dana said...

Very Funny...

Peggy said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! Love it!

Holly Jahangiri said...

That's great. You've probably heard this, but it never gets old: https://youtu.be/8Gv0H-vPoDc

whilldtkwriter said...

Thanks! I guessed big time that Lady Gaga might do "Bad Romance". BTW, I also did a parody of her and Beyonce's "Telephone" ("Fish Fries Telephone", http://whilldtkwriter.blogspot.com/2010/08/fish-fries-telephone.html). Love "Word Crimes"! So many grammarians made it their anthem and commented on it everywhere!

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